So many feelings today it's hard to sort through them. Woke up in an unpleasant way and was in tears within 10 minutes. Had a big bawl and was comforted by Superman and then he turned around and made it worse. Then I was sad and mad. Fuck!
Bff called and I burst into tears again, told her the whole story and received some comfort. Then we decided to go to Kits Pool and swim some laps and talk things through. It was the right thing to do Bff is also a member of my family and my troubles are coming from my clan so it's just good to be able to talk to someone who knows the history, is a great listener and has good mental health advice for me. Getting exercise at a time like this is also great. Relieves stress and gets my mind somewhere else.
Frustration! I fucking hate being misunderstood and email is so evil sometimes. Things get taken out of context and with the wrong tone and intention far too often. Oh yes and things that are said can not be taken back after the send button is pressed so you better be sure. I had some pretty horrible shit thrust at me last night and I tell you I didn't handle it well. I shoved some right back. Enough already, it's not a fucking contest to see whose feelings are the most hurt. Who wants to win that one? Not me.
I'm angry, surprised, disappointed, flabbergasted, misunderstood, disrespected, discouraged and feeling violated. Did I mention I am pissed off?
This is the second time this year that I have ended up in an email war with someone and let me tell you they only get worse as they progress, not better. I have to take some responsibility for not learning my lesson the first time. Lesson learned. Never again.
Oh and Facebook is the spawn of the devil. A playground for passive aggressive bullshit.
Here's my Facebook status- Barb is...Fuck You!
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